When My Uber Driver Asked Me to Marry Him in Ikoyi Traffic

Editor’s Note: At Crackko, we’re all about those “Did that really happen?!” moments. Today, we bring you a tale straight from the heart of Lagos chaos.

Our editor sat down with Teni, a Lagos-based creative, who had an Uber ride she’ll never forget. And no, it wasn’t because of traffic.

Editor: Okay, Teni, let’s dive in. Tell us about this Uber ride that turned into a whole Nollywood script.

Teni: (Laughs) Honestly, I still don’t believe it myself. It was a rainy Friday evening—the type where Lagos traffic turns into a real-life video game. I was soaked, hungry, and just trying to survive when I booked an Uber.

The car pulled up, and the driver was… surprisingly sharp. Fresh haircut, clean vibes. The type that makes you check if you entered the wrong category—like, was this a Bolt ride or private escort? (Laughs).

Editor: Sounds promising. So when did things start getting weird?

Teni: The small talk started pretty normal. You know, the usual Lagos script: rain, traffic, “Nigerians don’t have joy.” I wasn’t really paying attention until he asked, “Do you believe in love at first sight?”

At first, I thought it was a joke. Like, maybe he was trying to lighten the mood. So I replied, “Does it involve smokey Jollof or direct bank transfers?”

But this man wasn’t playing. He went from discussing traffic to deep relationship debates in two seconds flat. Before I knew it, we were talking about why Nigerian men fear women who know their worth and why pepper soup can ruin friendships.

Editor: So far, it sounds like a typical Lagos Uber chat. When did the twist happen?

Teni: Oh, it gets better. We were somewhere in Ikoyi, barely moving because of traffic, when he hit me with it: “I don’t know how to explain this, but I feel like I’ve known you forever. Marry me.”

I laughed so hard I almost choked. I was like, “Sorry, what?” And he repeated it—dead serious. He said he’d been praying for a wife, and boom, there I was. Apparently, God’s delivery system works through Uber.

Editor: Wait. A marriage proposal? From your Uber driver?

Teni: Exactly! Lagos is wild, I know. For a second, I considered it. I mean, who wouldn’t want a love story that starts in traffic? But then I remembered that wisdom my mum always says: If it’s too good to be true, it’s probably a scam.

So I asked, “What if I’m secretly a billionaire’s daughter and I’m just testing you?” He didn’t miss a beat and said, “Then I’ll be your chauffeur for life.”

Editor: That’s smooth, not going to lie. So, how did you escape?

Teni: When we finally reached my stop, he handed me his card. He said, “If you ever change your mind, call me. Wife material like you is rare.” I didn’t even know what to say. I just laughed and walked off.

But honestly, I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Lagos will humble you, but it also gives you the craziest stories.

Editor: That’s peak Lagos energy right there. Any advice for our readers who might find themselves in a similar situation?

Teni: Always have a backup plan. And maybe invest in earphones, so you don’t accidentally end up engaged after a ride.

Waitttttttttttttttt:

For more jaw-dropping tales and hilarious life fails, check out The ‘Oops!’ Chronicles.