We didn’t think Nigerians could outdo themselves when it came to drama and chaos, but these confessions had us clutching our wigs, shaking our heads, and laughing uncontrollably.
From near-misses with disaster to downright unbelievable moments, these stories will make you question reality.
Grab your popcorn because these are next-level wild.
1. The Tooth Fairy Heist
Submitted by Kemi – Yaba, Lagos
When I was eight, my mum told me the ‘tooth fairy’ would leave money under my pillow. Excited, I waited until my younger brother lost his first tooth. In the dead of night, I snuck into his room, took his tooth from under his pillow, and replaced it with a fake note I’d drawn with crayons.
In the morning, he cried because his ‘money’ wasn’t accepted at the tuck shop, and I blamed it on the fairy being broke. Fast forward 15 years, he found out the truth—and now calls me the family criminal.
2. The Engagement That Wasn’t Mine
Submitted by Bella – Jabi, Abuja
My boyfriend took me out to a fancy restaurant, acting super nervous. Midway through the meal, he stood up and pulled out a box. My heart was racing. Was this finally it? Was I getting a ring?!
Then he knelt down and said, ‘Can you hand this to your sister for me?’
Turns out, he’d been secretly dating my older sister and wanted me to deliver the proposal ring because he was ‘too shy.’ I didn’t know whether to laugh, cry, or flip the table. I just walked out.
3. The Uber of Doom
Submitted by Tolani – Lekki, Lagos
One night after partying, I ordered an Uber. The car showed up, and I got in. The driver didn’t say a word, just started driving. Halfway through, I realized I was being taken to the mainland—not my house in Lekki.
‘This isn’t the right way,’ I said, panicking.
‘Oh,’ the driver replied, casually. ‘I’m not an Uber. I thought you were a friend who needed a ride.’
Bro, I nearly jumped out of the moving car. Turns out, the real Uber was parked behind him, and I’d gotten into the wrong car.
4. The Pastor, the Crush, and the Fake Tongues
Submitted by Amara – Ede-Enu,Enugu
In university, I had a MASSIVE crush on this church boy who was always quoting Bible verses. One day, during a prayer session, I decided to impress him by speaking in tongues like everyone else.
Except I didn’t know how, so I just said ‘Chicken Honda Shaba’ repeatedly, thinking it sounded holy.
After the prayer, the pastor called me aside and said, ‘The Lord told me you need deliverance from a marine demon.’ My crush overheard and never spoke to me again.
Waittttttttt Before You Continue readinggggggggg:
For more thrilling near-disaster stories, check out Confessions & Close Calls.
5. The Snapchat Lie That Backfired
Submitted by Ahmed, Shomolu – Lagos
I met this babe on Snapchat, and we hit it off. To impress her, I told her I drove a Mercedes and lived in a mansion.
When we finally agreed to meet, I borrowed my uncle’s Benz and told her to wait outside while I ‘grabbed something from the house.’
The plan was foolproof—until my uncle came outside yelling, ‘Who’s driving my car?!’
She ghosted me after that. I deserved it.
6. My Wig Flew in a Danfo
Submitted by Adaora, Yaba – Lagos
I was rushing to work and hopped into a danfo. Midway through the ride, a sudden breeze hit my face. I reached up—my wig was gone.
I looked out the window and saw it flying down the road like it had dreams of freedom. The passengers laughed so hard they couldn’t breathe, and the driver shouted, ‘Madam, no vex. Na your destiny dey run go!’
I had to finish the ride in my wig cap, questioning my life choices.
7. The Chicken Revenge Plot
Submitted by Segun, Ibadan
When I was 10, my mum’s prize rooster used to terrorize me every morning. One day, I decided I’d had enough and locked it in the outdoor toilet.
Later that day, the whole family started looking for the rooster. I panicked and tried to ‘rescue’ it, but when I opened the door, it flew out and straight into the soup pot my mum was cooking.
That was the last day I saw that rooster, and till today, my mum doesn’t know I’m the reason her ‘prize chicken’ disappeared.
Want More?
If you thought these stories were wild, imagine what’s still hiding in the minds of Nigerians across the country. Have your own chaotic confession or close call? Share it with us, and we might feature you in the next installment of Crackko’s Confessions & Close Calls!
These stories prove one thing: life in Nigeria is never boring. Now, send this to your friends who need a good laugh, and don’t forget to subscribe to Crackko—where the drama is always premium.
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