How Borrowing a Car to Impress My Crush Ended in a Police Chase

The Plan: Impress Her, No Matter What
When Salima asked me to drive her to a wedding, I said yes without thinking. The catch? I didn’t own a car—or a driver’s license.

Determined not to let this ruin my chance, I borrowed my cousin’s sleek red Toyota Camry, aka his “babe magnet.” I didn’t ask permission. Love makes you bold—or stupid.

Act 1: Wedding Show-Off
I picked up Salima, blasting Wizkid for maximum effect. She stepped out in her gold aso-ebi, looking like royalty. “Wow, you came through,” she said, sliding into the passenger seat. My chest swelled.

The drive was smooth. I cracked jokes, she laughed, and I felt like a Nollywood lead. She even said, “You’re really good at this.” I grinned, ignoring the fact that I didn’t even know how to turn on the hazard lights.

At the venue, I parked with exaggerated finesse. She smiled at me, and I thought, I’ve nailed this.

Act 2: Trouble at the Toll Gate
On the way back, flashing blue lights appeared in my rearview mirror. “Are they following us?” Salima asked, her voice tight.

“No way,” I said, laughing nervously. But the police car sped up. My stomach dropped. Two things hit me at once: the car didn’t have valid papers, and I didn’t have a license.

The officers motioned for me to pull over. Panic took over. Instead of stopping, I hit the accelerator.

Act 3: Lekki Grand Prix
We shot forward like we were in Fast & Furious: Lagos Drift. Salima screamed, clutching her gele. “What are you doing?!”
“I’ve got this,” I lied.

I weaved through traffic, narrowly missing a car and a danfo. My hands were slick with sweat. Salima was yelling, “You’re going to kill us!”

It felt like hours, but after a few chaotic minutes, I turned into a street—only to realize it was a dead end.

Act 4: Nollywood Ending
The police cornered us, guns drawn. Salima’s glare could’ve melted steel.

“Step out of the vehicle,” an officer ordered. My legs shook as I complied. I stammered out the truth: “It’s not my car, and I don’t have a license. I just… wanted to impress her.”

Salima stared at me like I was an alien. “So, all of this chaos… to show off?” she said, her voice dripping with disbelief.

I tried to respond, but she just shook her head, stepped out, and flagged down a passing cab. The last thing I saw was her getting in without looking back.

The Aftermath
The police let me off with a stern warning and a not-so-light “settlement.” My cousin’s car? Confiscated. My shot with Salima? Dead and buried.

Lesson learned: sometimes, trying too hard makes you look harder than you are—and not in a good way.

Borrowing a car without a license might sound bold, but this chaos takes showing off to a whole new level. For more outrageous fails and hilarious misadventures, explore The ‘Oops!’ Chronicles!