Imagine Doing This for a Living? The Hilariously Absurd Cultural Trends That Shouldn’t Exist (But Do)

You’ve Heard of Side Hustles, But Have You Tried Soul-Selling Rituals and Air-Gobbling Competitions?

We live in a world where people say, “Follow your passion,” and apparently, for some, that passion is stunningly bizarre. Let’s break down some cultural experiments so wild, you’d think they came straight out of a fever dream—yet, they’re 100% real. Buckle up, because things are about to get weirdly relatable.

1. The Toe Wrestling Championship: Because Arm Wrestling Wasn’t Gross Enough

In England (because of course it’s England), people decided that arm wrestling was too mainstream and invented toe wrestling. Yes, you heard that right. Competitors interlock their big toes and try to pin each other’s feet to the ground.

Imagine training for months, practicing your toe dexterity, only to face off with someone whose feet haven’t seen soap since the 2016 Olympics. Nigerian moms watching this would scream, “Toe what? Abeg, go and wash your legs before you disgrace this family!”

Just pray you don’t cramp up mid-match, or worse, lose to someone with funky feet. That’s an L you carry for life.

2. The World Beard and Moustache Championships: Facial Hair or Fine Art?

Every two years, people from all over the world gather to showcase beards and moustaches so elaborate, they’d make Gandalf blush. From moustaches styled like handlebars to beards shaped like Viking ships, this isn’t just grooming—it’s architecture.

Nigerian dads watching this with their patchy beards: “If I knew this was a career path, I wouldn’t have wasted time shaving in the 80s!”

And let’s be honest, the only way most of us are winning this contest is if they create a category for “Most Persistent Struggle Beard.”

3. Extreme Ironing: Because Why Should Chores Be Boring?

If you thought ironing your clothes was a mundane task, think again. Extreme ironing enthusiasts take their boards and irons to the most ridiculous places—underwater, on mountain peaks, or even mid-air while skydiving.

Nigerian parents: “You’re ironing on a mountain? But the clothes on your bed are still wrinkled?”

It’s like a crossover episode between Laundry Day and Mission Impossible. One wrong move and your clothes are pressed and permanently lost to the abyss.

4. Kanamara Matsuri: Japan’s Festival Celebrating Giant… Eggplants?

Okay, not eggplants, but you get the vibe. The Kanamara Matsuri, or “Festival of the Steel Phallus,” is a yearly event in Japan where everything is shaped like a giant penis—candles, lollipops, and even parade floats.

The festival’s meant to promote fertility, sexual health, and safe practices, but it’s also a meme factory waiting to happen. Imagine posting a selfie with a six-foot-tall pink schlong and captioning it, “Just another wholesome Saturday.”

Nigerians: “Ah! God forbid!”

But hey, in a world full of weird festivals, at least this one’s raising awareness and eyebrows.

5. The Baby Jumping Festival: Spain’s Idea of a Trust Exercise

In the Spanish village of Castrillo de Murcia, grown men dressed as devils literally jump over babies lying on mattresses. It’s supposed to cleanse the infants of sin and protect them from evil spirits.

Nigerian aunties watching this: “Jump over what? So if he slips, we should just say sorry? No, thank you!”

Honestly, if a guy in a devil costume can leap over you without tripping, maybe you really are blessed.

Ever wondered what happens when you mix ancient traditions with modern social media? Find out in our collection of thought-provoking cultural stories in Cultural Experiments.

Moral of the Madness?

Some cultural trends make you laugh, some make you cringe, and some make you want to text your ancestors for guidance. But at the end of the day, these bizarre traditions are proof that humans are just out here winging it. And honestly? We’re all just one weird idea away from being the next viral sensation.

So the next time someone calls your hustle crazy, just say, “It’s a cultural experiment.” Because if people can get famous for toe wrestling, ironing on cliffs, or celebrating giant eggplants, your wild idea might just be the next big thing.